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I expect my ex to violate our brand new, court approved, negotiated divorce decree.

Should I keep a log of such transgressions?

At what point should I seek legal help to enforce compliance: financial and otherwise?

Some options seem to be: At the time of the first transgression, After a certain number of transgressions, When the dollar amount goes over a certain amount.

(I hope things go smoothly going forward, or at least reasonably smoothly, but I doubt that will happen.)

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  • Do you expect a particular type of transgression?
    – phoog
    May 11, 2017 at 2:54
  • @phoog Yes, in part because the divorce was unpleasant, expensive, and drawn out (took 2 years) due to no ccoperation.
    – user3270
    May 12, 2017 at 16:56
  • @phoog I expect transgressions in every area: child support, bad mouthing in front of the child, lack of communication when needed, inappropriate communication with others, etc., etc.
    – user3270
    May 23, 2017 at 13:49

1 Answer 1

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Frankly, this is only partially a legal question - mostly it's just about what makes most sense for you, personally. Anyway, I'll try to help.

I expect my ex to violate our brand new, court approved, negotiated divorce decree.

Should I keep a log of such transgressions?

Yes - why not? It costs very little (just a bit of your time), and while it may not turn out to be useful, it could very well be:

  • to show to others (lawyer, judge) that a transgression happened repeatedly
  • to better explain the history of the problems between you
  • to help yourself better judge the situation (is it getting better, or worse?)

So just grab a notepad (or a computer file, or whatever) and make some short notes when something significant happens.

At what point should I seek legal help to enforce compliance: financial and otherwise?

Some options seem to be: At the time of the first transgression, After a certain number of transgressions, When the dollar amount goes over a certain amount.

Now this is not really a legal question - the answer is: it depends. Legally, you usually do not need to tolerate any transgressions (details may depend on jurisdiction and nature of settlement), so you could probably sue even for trivial transgressions.

However, in practice pursuing legal action comes with a cost:

  • your time, for researching and talking to a lawyer
  • your money, for the lawyer, court and other costs
  • possibly your peace of mind, if you find it stressful to pursue someone in court, to have heated discussions etc.

Of course, if you successfully pursue a transgression, this will have upsides, too. So, as always in life, you must weigh both and decide. A good lawyer should help you with that (though for a fee). If you have a specific legal question, you can also ask here :-).

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  • What type of violations do courts consider substantive? I do not want to annoy a judge with something that will be considered minor.
    – user3270
    May 24, 2017 at 1:56
  • Sorry, there is no general rule - you'll have to rely on your common sense. If you are unsure (or even if not), by all means try to find knowledgeable help, such as child protection services, family counseling, a specialised lawyer or similar.
    – sleske
    May 24, 2017 at 7:33
  • Among the requests for court enforcement of a court approved parenting plan, what is the nature of those requests? What types of relief are typically or often asked for? What types of relief are rarely asked for?
    – user3270
    May 25, 2017 at 14:42
  • @user3270: Please don't ask new questions in comments - ask a new question instead (suitable formulated, of course).
    – sleske
    May 30, 2017 at 19:42

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